Consumption

I remember learning about times of American settlers in grade school. We used to play "Oregon Trails" on our Apple computers and sometimes when you would set your pace at grueling and your rations on meager your little sister would die of Consumption. I never understood what that really was.

Today, in the 21st century we have a whole new kind of consumption. The consumption of products marketed at us 24 hr.s a day. When my Momma asked me what I wanted for X-mas I didn't have anything planned out because with all the help she's giving for the wedding I didn't think it was appropriate to ask for extra crap on top of this very expensive one day. She convinced me to think of something.

I went on Amazon and thought, "Oh, well, I do want these expensive running shoes!" and then, "Oh yeah, I would also love this DVD or this PS2 game." Before I knew it I racked up almost 20 things on my list. Now, I really want those things while before I was mediocre about wanting them. The expectation of getting makes the want worse I think. Maybe, in a year from now I'll wonder... Did I really want those things or was the expectation making the desire so strong?

Maybe having a wedding is the same... Before this whole wedding thing I wanted to elope to Greece with Kent. My father said, "You wouldn't really do that would you?" Well... Yes, I would have. Then I got to thinking... Will I regret not having the wedding? Maybe. Now that I'm planning and running around trying to figure out this and that, I'm caught up in it. The expectation of it makes it more alluring.

I've been to probably 40 weddings in the last 5 years. I have seen some of the worst and some of the better weddings in the corridor area. I know they are a real pain in the ass. Yet, suddenly I'm excited about the prospect of my own upcoming event.

The point is our desire to consume is like a forest fire. It grows with oxygen. The more I talk about my desires and give them "air time" the more my need for them grows. I need to remember to slow down... Breath slower and think slower. When it comes to consumption you cannot submit to it.