Monday, August 29, 2005


Rocker Interrupted
I don't know how many of you know this but there is a part of my heart reserved for the '80s hair band Rock music. Come to my wedding expecting a few G-N-R songs, a few cheesy rock ballads, and some just get wild-fun-fist raised rock songs!
I revisited that part of myself on Sunday night when Kent took me to the "Rock Never Stops tour" with Ratt, Quiet Riot, Firehouse and Cinderella headlining. I raised my devil horns to the rock gods. I was interested to see that the lead singer and drummer of Quiet Riot definitely had droopy old man butts. Also, I don't think he was stuffing cause the package in that department was also pretty unimpressive. I almost wish he had packed a sock. They did declare, "B**w J*bs for Grandpas!" So at least they could admit they were old.
As for me I was lookin' pretty bad ass. I could tell because the rocker chick working the front door with the tight jeans and hairsprayed up bangs told me how hot my outfit was. I went for a jean skirt, ripped tight rock band t-shirt, a silvery-blue rocker scarf, rocker earrings, and my hair slightly teased for height.I got a few google eyes from the bald beer bellied guys.
I didn't get as many looks as the dyed blond chick who did a very interesting interpretive dance to GNR's "Welcome to the Jungle, Baby" where she incorporated a drumstick into her routine. She also made ample use of her thong and her t-shirt (or lack thereof) to draw in the crowd. You get the picture.
However, some messed up girl in the bathroom asked me, "You wouldn't happen to know how to get in to sleep with the band?" I was honored that I looked so right that this young lady would seek my advice on such a subject. I told her I didn't and good luck on her quest. Another girl thought my ta-tas looked good enough to sign and told me how to do it. I had to work the next day and didn't think it was appropriate to go into the elementary school with rocker's signatures all over myself. It was tempting, though.
I never asked but I guess I assumed I was too young for concerts like this (back in the day when I was listening to GNR and Aerosmith while living in Wisconsin). Today, I fulfill that fantasy. I even scored myself a Cinderella guitar pick that was thrown at the crowd!
The guy from Cinderella was actually pretty impressive. He could play the saxophone and the piano! At one point during a very emotional song he collapsed and cried out to us, "Your ripping my heart out!," over and over again. He really looked like he was going to cry. I imagined that if my brother has become a rocker instead of a lawyer he would have been like the lead singer of Cinderella. They even kind of looked the same. If you know these bands you can guess the songs they played: Round-n-round, Cum on feel the noize, Gypsy Rose, Mental Health, Girl don't treat me bad, Shake me, ect. It was all very exciting.
Kent tried to play the rebel when we rushed the stage by trying to get people moshing or something. I think those guys were too old for that, though, and ended up just annoyed with us. One guy actually told me to, "Calm down your man." Another woman told us to excuse ourselves when we rushed the stage! Who are these people?!?!! Old people, I guess. He he.
Anyway, all you rockers raise your fist to the rock gods. Rock lives!

3 comments:

sawbewitched said...

It sounds like you both had a great time. What fun! Do all that fun stuff now, when you start to have children it really slows that stuff down a few notches.

Mike and Annette said...

Sounds like quite a night. Go Baby! I wish I could have seen you all dressed like that. You are one beautiful woman.

bschneider5 said...

Nice ticket!